Understand And Get Control Of Your Feelings
In order to get control of your feelings, first you need to understand what makes you feel the way you do. You want to be able to understand why you handle any given situation the way you do. By knowing why you handle things the way you do, you can have better control of yourself.
Try this simple exercise to help you understand your feelings.
Sit upright in a comfortable chair and pay close attention to how different parts of your body feel. Pay attention to how you breathe. Do you breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth? Is your breathing deep or shallow? Are there areas of your body feel tension? Just sit for a few minutes and become familiar with how your body reacts to sitting still in a chair.
Now pay close attention to any feelings, images or memories that come to your mind. What are these feelings telling you about yourself? Are you having positive or negative feelings? The more you get to understand your feelings, the more in touch with your emotions you become.
Take a few moments to acknowledge your feelings. If you are having “bad” feelings, realize it is okay to feel that at this time. Do not try to analyze your feelings right now. Just simply let your feelings come through.
If you’re feeling comfortable and at peace, just allow yourself to feel good. If you are feeling fear or anger, then allow yourself to discover what is causing this.
If you’re feeling pain, allow yourself to feel it and take note of what is causing the pain. Just let all your feelings come out and acknowledge them. By learning to understand your feelings, you can gain more self-control.
No matter what kind of feelings you are having, recognize that there is a reason for the way you are feeling. Gently ask yourself why you are feeling this way. Is there something happening that is causing you feel this way? Something in your potential conscious awareness?
Was there a noise or scent that reminded you of something that made you feel that way?
Do not try to understand your feelings at this point. Being aware, particularly self-aware, is what we’re looking for here.
The more you learn to recognize your feelings, the easier it is to figure out how to change them if needed.
OK, this sounds goofy but it’s a bit of self-hypnosis, so play along with me…Focus on the feeling you are having and express the feeling by making a sound that goes along with the feeling. You could scream, cry, take a deep breath, you could laugh or make any other sound that will express how you are feeling.
If you are feeling sad, you can recognize that and be okay with that. Allow yourself to feel whatever emotion you are feeling and then comfort or calm yourself.
Allow yourself to totally recognize why you are feeling the way you are and then allow yourself to let go of the feeling. The more you get to know yourself, the more you will be able to achieve total self-control.
Don’t expect this all to come instantly. If you’ve never done this before, it can be more challenging than it sounds.
In order to gain total self control, you must first decide what you want from life.
How would you describe your optimal life? What are your hopes and dreams? Are you looking for friends and relationships? Do you want more money and a better lifestyle? Do you wish you had better health? Would you like a better or more challenging job?
Have you ever tried to make changes to any of the areas of your life you wanted to change and were unable to succeed? What things did you do that made it not work out for you, and what do you think you could do differently to make it work now?
Perhaps taking a different approach than you did the first time, you can succeed this time. Look at it from different angles and see if you can figure out ideas that will help you this go ’round.
No matter what it is that you want to do in order to have your best life, start working on the things it takes to make them happen.
If you want better health, what changes would you need to make in order to make this happen? If you want to have more money, but you have negative thoughts about it, figure out what is at the root of the self-sabotage.
If you would like a better job, what do you need to do in order to land it?
Take time to figure out all the different things you want and desire from your life and then write down everything you need to do in order to achieve these things.
By knowing what you want out of life, you are on your way to gaining self-control. If you know what you want, then go after it with everything you’ve got. Develop an attitude of near certainty that you will accomplish what you set out to do.
Develop your skills each day and work on yourself and your confidence will grow.
You hold the key to your success in your own hands. All you have to do is reach out and grab it. Take steps each day to work towards what you want out of life and each day will become a little easier and you will be a little closer to reaching your best outcomes…
Science of Influence
The Science of Influence Master Volume VI – Invisible Influence
Knowing What They Think and Who They Think You Are
Do you need to have listened to any of the previous CD’s to use this program?
No. It has been intentionally designed to be newcomer friendly.
For those of you who have only been “here” for a year or less, this program,
The Science of Influence Master Volumes 61-72 is my effort to “top” what
most everyone reports as their favorite of the Library, 49-60.
When I listened to it, I felt comfortable that this program
accomplishes that. 61-72 is superior.
This program is brand new, unreplicated material.
The field of influence and it’s subfield of persuasion continue to grow with fresh research from the best minds on the planet.
More books about persuasion were published in the last three years than in recorded history to date.
Almost all of these books were rehash of Cialdini, Carnegie, and myself. There wasn’t really anything new.
But the persuasion and researchers….well that is a different story. I had a “field day” this year stacking just shy of seven FEET of research. I’ve synthesized this with results from dozens of real world applications.
Here’s some of what I’ve distilled from current research that youcan put into immediate use:
We learned a lot about the relationship of how people “feel about products, services and people” and the mental shortcuts they use to buy.
The first cluster of material I developed was about how people connect with YOU when they buy from you.
So, Who Is Your Customer, Anyway?
What do they think?
How do they feel?
Does it matter?
So what? Can that be used for ANYTHING?
Turns out it can….
Identity in Persuasion
It’s in a cluster I call IDENTITY. Identity research could fill 12 CD’s all by itself, but that would have left too much excluded that I wanted you to have NOW.
So, I put together the core concepts of IDENTIFICATION and IDENTITY and how YOU can utilize this cluster of information in influencing others.
One example would be something like, “If you know someone is a Republican who voted for Bush in the last election, how does that help me predict what they will think, buy, and feel about it all today when I ask them to buy from me?”
Obviously we all identify with other people. Around the house here and in the home office, you’ll hear people
refer to me as being just like HOUSE (House M.D./Hugh Laurie). I find that hard to imagine as he is older than I am and uses a cane….
In public, people tell me that I remind them of Kelsey Grammer, Robin Williams, Drew Carey and David Letterman all rolled into one. Must be a very overweight guy….
So the point is that they identify me….with them.
That means they will SEE ME through those filters. Those filters will completely change their perceptions of me, my work and whether they will hire me or not. For years people have used the word filters….
How would you like to know what that REALLY MEANS? How would you like to understand what you get from a filter?!
Identification and Identity are profound areas of influence research that are now coming to the surface. It’s nothing short of fascinating and of course no one knows about it yet.
I DID see a couple of Internet Marketers use material that they got at Boot Camp where I touched on Identity. I think they did rather well in their launch…..
Aside from that you will be the first to use this virgin research.
Because the concept of “persona” is so poorly understood and underutilized outside of show business and branding, I do show you how to develop your own persona. Little is more important in being THE person want to do business with…I’ll come to that in a minute….
I decided not to open with something so profound, however.
10 Simple Steps to Persuade Anyone
Mark Joyner, who is probably the all time #1 Internet Marketer on the planet, asked me to write a small piece of his book, Simpleology. (Very good book btw)
He wanted 10 steps I use when I persuade. Not when other people persuade, but when I do, and he wanted me to make them simple and easy to understand no matter how complex they are.
That was a challenge but in doing some self-modeling I was able to develop quite a cool construct that I’ve never written about and now for the first time you get it all.
This one long CD is of significant value to those who want to influence, especially in business. I’d like to say it’s worth the price of admission but would you think one CD could be worth $600?
Maybe not…it is…but maybe not. So I’ll just say it’s pretty excellent and leave it at that….
Influencing the Long Tail
Finding the meeting point in the world between you and the universe of people who would LOVE to do business with you, is the subject of the next couple of CD’s.
Legend Point: YOU are THE answer for a group of people out there. I show you how to project the image and persona you need to project to draw that group to you.
This portion of Science of Influence 61-72 is just too cool. It was a lot of fun to synthesize the work that’s been done in this area and make it pretty simple to understand and just as easy to make real for
Persuasion’s Best Kept Secret
In Science of Influence Four, I briefly touched on MVD. MVD is short for Most Valued Dimension.
No one (no one) had ever reported this phenomenon to the public except …me.
So for most people, it was so unusual that it went right over their heads. But about 20 people wrote this year and asked a ton of questions about how to calculate the MVD for themselves.
This is an incredibly potent persuasion tool that is waiting for people to learn. This is NOT easy and it is NOT simple.
I have made it approachable.
If you really want to know WHY people pick YOU and YOUR PRODUCT, this is the answer. Once you know WHY people pick YOU, it is a lot easier to project those FEATURES (NOT BENEFITS) to the public.
Once again, if I could say that this CD was worth the price of admission…..but I won’t. I’ll wait for YOU to tell ME.
How do Mind Readers Know What You’re Thinking? The other thing people constantly ask is how I read their minds so easily. OK.
It’s in CD 66. (THE ENTIRE CD IS HOW MIND READERS DO IT!)
The Mind Reading CD is *definitely* worth the price of admission, no maybe’s about it. It’s frigging excellent.
Yes. I show you what to do, what to say, and how.
Enough said….you’ll see. (And do listen to this CD numerous times.)
The Ultimate Power Factor in Persuasion
CD 67 discusses in detail the two most important factors in persuasion, bar none. In detail that I’ve never given this subject, you will gain an awakening awareness to these two core concepts of behavior and the keys to control of behavior.
Subliminal Persuasion & Perception
The 3rd most commonly requested information was “subliminal X.” Man, do people want to know about subliminal stuff and you should, too, because it is the future of marketing and influence. Sooooo….you get it one crystal clear hour where I pound out recent research and what it means to how you will persuade, or not.
Fewer people ask for “recent research” unless we count “what’s new in persuasion,” and then that is what the next program is about.
Current Research Gives You a 3:1 Edge
Current research in persuasion is voluminous and over the next two CD’s I cover a LOT of stuff quite quickly almost always with examples and specifics for YOU. New research is always intoxicating because it is stuff no one knows about yet…because it is new.
And I love new stuff…
Eminently useful immediately.
You will like. You will put into use immediately. The final two CD’s are pretty cool.
A Complete Guide to Analyzing Your Customer
For the first time ever, I show you how to analyze your customer. The questions you want to ask YOURSELF about YOUR CUSTOMER (or the girl or whoever) and then I show you how to utilize that analysis to cause people to “change their minds” (and yes, their behavior). Once again, cutting-edge research merges with real world applications and makes you the master. (Well, maybe not after
listening just once…but, drill this stuff into your brain a few times, and you will do very well, indeed.)
Science of Influence Volumes 61-72 will take you through the next quantum leap.
It’s not only cool, it’s approachable, it’s exciting, it’s intense. You will be the first to have almost all of this information. You will be the first to use this information and I’m excited to be the person who gives it to you.
12 hours on 12 Audio CDs : 150-Page Manual on CD