Do you represent a great product/service?
Are you a GREAT acquisition?
Are you proud of the above?…enough to BUY?!
Who matters most to you in life?
Children, parents, boss, other yardsticks? Many of these people won’t judge you fairly. BUT because they matter to YOU, they matter to you.
How do the above people stand in your way or push you forward?
Your spouse or boss can be a disaster or a gift.
SHOULD THEY believe in YOU?
SHOULD YOU believe in YOU?
If you should not, DO NOT. Do the things necessary to move forward then reassess where you are. Prove to yourself that you are now trustworthy to your desired outcomes and making them happen.
Who are your 1,2,3 accountability people? You don’t want MORE. You can’t answer to too many people. And you really only need one, if that person is consistently predictable and responsible in their own world.
Ask yourself this question:
Who can you be valuable to you beyond family and friends? (customers and clients)
Are you certain? How do you know one way or the other?
Ask yourself this question as well:
Who needs and wants what I have that I can deliver?
What do they want and need to the extent that you can help them?
How will their people/family feel about you doing business with them?
People do NOT make decisions by themselves.
They use the ROLODEX.
“What would my neighbors think if I were driving around in that goofy looking car?”
You’re trying to preclude the conversation, “that’s a really dumb car you bought.”
They don’t want to have the conversation, “I talked to the wife and she said no.”
BUT THEY DID IN THE ROLODEX
When you frame the question, while you are asking them to X, realize THEY SEE a HALF DOZEN more people than YOU DO. Those “people in the mind” are the real decision makers. The bad part is that they are in the mind. But that’s also the good aspect.
The group of people in the rolodex are not necessarily “related” in any way.
Propose your proposal so all of the rolodex is included.
What do they need to do to convince them that they are smart. His people must know that he made the RIGHT DECISION.
Is their trust in you logical? If so great. If not, you can’t do well.
Logical means you are pretty much right.
Can they make an obvious argument for them to be your dating coach? Your health consultant? Your number one business contact?
What are the people familiar with?
They are ALL on AUTOPILOT. Familiarity and Comfort and NOTHING ELSE.
Your potential client will interact with their people and they will be or not, comfort and familiar.
If you are freaking out, people’s friends simply say, “no.” Period.
Honey I gotta go to Kevin Hogan’s Influence Boot Camp because of…………….even though it’s in Vegas. [Kevin broke his leg in June and we are waiting to see if he will be able to do Boot Camp in October 2022 or postpone until March 2023.]
Why? Because no one brings more to your long term stability and financial security because of your direct application of real world strategies than Kevin Hogan.
It’s simple. Always keep it simple to understand and discuss.
The Lesson of Doing the Dishes, You’ve Never Understood…Now You Will
Magnet Store. Mall of America. Never knew there was such a place. A MAGNET STORE? OK. What’s got my attention?
“I do dishes,” “I don’t do dishes.”
What? Who is in the store?
Bunch of ladies except me. It’s all about doing dishes and housework. I NEVER would have guessed. I like doing dishes. Everyone else does dishes wrong. They break glasses regularly, the strainer is clogged typically. Dang. There IS a right way to do dishes.
Determine and control the context (you own it at your website)
Example: Google Adwords. “Use Hypnosis to get the girl” you know that when they arrive it should match what was on the text in the face.
“Invest here to make millions.” That instantly fails.
Changing the context lesson changes your LIFE.
Imagine the first time someone plays blackjack. They really have no idea what they are doing. You can win the first time you visit the casino, but far more likely is that you won’t.
YOU create your context in this case. The casino is the same every day. The difference is YOU, your knowledge and your actions.
Different contexts: with you vs. the Speedy Cash People. You have 5 people from each side. One group will go broke and one will get wealthy. WHO you hang out with is Monstrous.
Did you buy bitcoin at 30K or 40 K or 50 K or 60 K?
That’s OK. A great lesson learned. You won’t do it again.
And if bitcoin somehow returns to say 40k, and anything is possible even when you are buying digital air…but the lesson of course is that you were hanging out with Speedy Cash People. People who chase money.
Suggestion: Don’t do that.
I had a conversation just last year with a family member. Smart family member?
“You know, gold is not a good investment…”
Everyone knows I love gold. But the comment is right, it’s not an investment. It’s an insurance policy. Gold insures against the government’s stupidity. It insures against the markets stupidity. It insures against the owners stupidity who blows money left and right. Gold pays off because it stays at home in the safe….for decades. It’s always there. It didn’t pay a dividend. It didn’t change much in value. It’s simply there and when disaster strikes every 15 years, you have security, safety and stability. Everyone else is terrified that the sky will fall. And of course it does. But something like gold, has been predictable for thousands of years.
Stuff sticks around. Go google “Dow Jones Industrials 1920.” How many companies in the Dow from a century ago are still in business? Go for it…
Surprised? I was! Air vanishes, stuff sticks around.
Think about this for a Moment
Mom wanted you to go to the big business with benefits.
Danielle asked me and I told her benefits were something you will never see while working at the company.
Truck Stop: Veggie Burger. (Maybe it was Stuckey’s, I don’t recall) Grandfather says, “can we see the manager?” Grandfather was never talking, until grandmother, also a former teacher said, “Your sign is spelled incorrectly.”
“Yes Ma’am, My sign is that way on purpose.”
Oh my THAT was a lesson.
People want and need to be right and tell you that you, are wrong and that they themselves are right. This is one of the greatest lessons in persuasive communication of any kind.
Simply be certain to make the mistake very tiny, like one mosquito bite. If the mistake is huge, like buying bitcoin at 40 k, then you look like an idiot. Don’t put that out there. But one letter mis-spelled here and there. Not a crisis and from a persuasive context to non-grammarians? It’s a big benefit. You aren’t perfect, you make mistakes but you have your s**t together.
If you make a lot of errors you appear to be (yep) stupid. If you make a couple they sort of make sense.
Predetermine the optimal result for them. You want people to be able to make an obvious choice, then help them along to do that.
Dan Ariely did a study with economist.com. They offered The Economist.com and The Economist magazine delivered to your it was $125. or you could order just E.com for $69 OR you could have E magazine for $125. 2/3 bought the top option.
“Any idiot would know this is the best choice for them.”
The second way you over come reactance is the Identity Link. Information from Facebook is a huge overcoming factor because you find out threads of connection between you and all kinds of people in all kinds of different ways.
You want to do business with people like you.
It’s easy to get a customer.
Hard to keep a customer.
You’re in that phase of the relationship/communication where you are now attempting to plug the cord into the wall socket?
Nothing is more important than empathy. If you don’t have empathy, they WILL or WON’T see it., you WILL or WON’T get an opt in.
Your business is not the name of your corporation.
Your business is not what you sell.
Your business is…your fans and friends.
My son called me for Fathers Day and told me that the bar manager, his pool playing teammate got in a car accident. He passed away yesterday. It was painful. My son was the customer, the bar manager was part of the business. They hung out. They were friends. He wasn’t a “customer,” he was a friend. It’s important when you are in a “business venture” to remember that the people who you have valuable relationships are your friends. Sometimes your customers are your friends and sometimes they are not!
If you refer to people as a list then they are a THING. If I say they are my friends there is a completely different frame.
If I referred to people as my list then I would cheapen me and those people.
But I don’t think in that ether. Instead think of it like this…the people that you love, you tend to do right most of the time.
How you perceive your “list” will determine your income and who you hang out with at night.
Reactance is the instant no that comes because you are afraid of being manipulated.
Resistance of course is different. Resistance comes in all relationships. Sometimes one person suggests something and the other person rolls their eyes. That’s resistance. (an example, if you will)
If everything is perfect it’s not believable. You can only be SO amazing.
When you communicate with people face to face or online, either add or delete status symbols.
There is an interesting change in how you feel about yourself when you add or delete status symbols from what you are wearing.
People do not like to be out-statused. It MIGHT be a good thing when you are the ultimate authority, maybe.
Status can have a backfire situation.
The less stuff you NEED, the more valuable you seem to other men. The OPPOSITE is true for most women.
Men have no problem with seeing a woman with necklace, jewelery.
Men could wear stuff, in general and in most demographics, that cause perceptions to reduce as far as favorability.
If you’re a man, wear your wedding ring, perhaps a watch and no other jewelry. The downside is too great.
Awesome Persuasion Prep
Always arrive early and learn the waiters name early.
Introduce your guest to your server. “John, this is Bill.”
You do your homework. It gives people instant security and safety. Do this in every aspect of life.
Does the Girl Demand YOU, and no other?
“How do you want the girl to DEMAND YOU…?” You want a card that says, “Would love to have a glass of wine with you.”
That’s the way.
They’ll think you are elegant. You can’t lose.
Arrive early, know the waiters name, if people arrive at your website, and you know them you win. What are they thinking. You MUST KNOW.
These are the simple ways to think of influencing others.
It really comes down to being an elegant individual who comes prepared, is safe, is known, is aware, is predictable.
It comes down to being…